Life is for the Living

Dear Steve
Something you believed in so much but who would have thought it would mean so much. Its awfully frightening for us left behind, as we don't want to keep going. We want things just as they were when you were here.
Fathers day was a day looming up on us all! Every advert hurting us all! Didn't realise how many times it was constantly referred to on the radio and the tv.
Victoria and Megan spent the day together, helping each other through a day which should have been spent with you.
Instead you would be pleased to know they spent doing what they love to do! Which is hours shopping in Primark!!!
Not ignoring the fact you werent here but instead comforting each other and chatting about you, you will always be a huge part of our lives.
Megs is missing you so much at athletics, she misses your coaching and amazing support and Victoria found out she will be in China house at her new school, which she screamed about!
But life is for the living and Im trying I went out on Friday to Ascot and all I could do was think you would have been here. You loved the races! Not for the horses so much but more for the ladies in thier fancy dresses! And I think I would have done you proud! The girl scrubbed up well!! And depsite the rain really enjoyed myself. Felt strange laughing, talking to strangers who didnt know about you. So much so I found telling every man I spoke to about you. Which always brought the conversation down to a sad place, not that was my intention but more it was about being loyal to you. But in a very strange way I did enjoy myself. I found myself laughing. Laughing out loud about absolutely rubbish things! All those things I hated only a few months ago! Random silly pointless conversations! I wasnt only listening to them but was taking part in them! How strange life is!
So have sort of decided that all those shoes in America probably need an outing at some point, so who knows may go out again in the not too distant future.
Darling I love you very much and your always going to be a huge part of my life.

x x x x x x